Polygamy Will Save The Black Community – a quote like that can start a spiritual war that I just don’t have the battle gear for. I was in a deep conversation with a close male friend that wanted to tell me why he finds it so hard to stay committed in a relationship as a man. His main reason rested upon the sole idea of him being a man. By breaking down the make up of a man, he pinpointed the belief that marriage, monogamy and traditional structures of family are the downfall to society as a whole but Polygamy could save the Black Community.
I was in utter shock when he mentioned this to me but as his friend I had to hear him out and let him explain to me the meaning behind his radical and out of the blue theory. We all know that the current state of the African-American community isn’t pleasant. There are more single parent homes than ever before, a large decline in educational growth amongst African-American men (which fluctuates and is almost even with African-American women currently) and the overwhelming prison population totals, in short, our people are suffering. I was eager to hear how polygamy would rescue our people from all of that when my friend broke down the dynamic of the community’s fall. Basically, black women out numbers the total of African-American men and men are naturally interested in more than one woman at a time. “Wouldn’t we create a stronger family role if men were able to build multiple families under an umbrella of marriage? We see this all the time with the brotherhood in Africa. They were on to something. The key is being able to take care of your family” he mentioned.
I know that as an African-American woman who prefers to date African men, I hear this theory all of the time as a warning to never date and or consider marrying an African man. (I will save the stereotypes that come along with my preference for the next blog so get ready!) He went on to say that men were set up to procreate without limitations and that can be proven by way of their sperm count. Women are supposed to be selective in who they procreate with which is why they only have one womb and can carry (for the most part) only one mans child (or children) at a time. Whereas, men can mate with numerous women at the same time and create a wave of offspring with multiple women. (Am I the only one that remembered when Lil Wayne was on his way to jail and all of a sudden got a few women pregnant at the same time. Gosh he really did try to sow his royal oats huh.)
This still didn’t explain how polygamy can save the black community. He mentioned that the overall issue is with a lack of available brothers with the proper mindset and establishment in society that can “scoop” up all of the women they would want to build families with. Some of them can already be blended. So, he wants to activate the “Captain Save Her” mission all across America. So, ladies, I guess we should get a sign up list started so that all the well off men can marry us in bulk and play the role of father to our fatherless children. This sounds ridiculous but at the same time sounds like an extreme gesture to right what is currently wrong.
What is wrong with polygamy anyway. I get all upset in my predetermined moral gene pool about it because as a child I was told it was wrong. I know that I am a Christian and I was raised a Christian. I don’t know if it is strength or stupidity that forces me to remain loyal to how I was raised without an open mind to embracing something else whole heartedly. Now what does that rant have to do with the topic? It is the same concept with polygamy? Why do we hate it? Why is it bad and more importantly why is it ONLY seen from a male perspective. Polygamy seems sexist. If I had “Oprah” money and wanted to marry a troop of guys, do you think they would go for that? The root of polygamy is the mans ability to take care of the woman but gender roles will hinder a woman from being able to “FULLY” take care of multiple men.
How can polygamy benefit us when it will only add another form of division amongst us. I can see it now. Oh, she is one of those polygamist, she couldn’t find her own single man so she had to go away with a tribe to have a respectable family. Lord Jesus, it would be a fire. I know this is totally left field but it is worth the discussion. Are we at the end of the bridge for correcting the issues within the African-American community and is this a possible key to reactivating the role of family within our community?